Do you think it's a good thing or a bad thing that my scale only weighs in 1 pound increments? Right now, I don't know. Ok, if you have vehement opinions about NOT weighing yourself, please go away now, because my mind's made up. I weigh myself ONCE a day, every day, in the morning, after the daily "evacuation," and usually near-nekkid (undies only). I think it is a good almanac of how my weight is comparing to the activity and food I journal every day, as well as help me realize that I am trending down, even if the scale doesn't move every day. I know Aunt Flo (that rhymes!) is just around the corner and we've had two or three sweltering DC swamp days (100+ temp, with 100% humidity), so I'm sure I'm also retaining water. So far, I have weighed 275 for four days running. I'm not complaining (exactly), my brain knows that four days does not = plateau, and that my body needs time to adjust and la-la-la... I am just impatient to see the weight come off. I mean, I bought those size 22 pants on SUNDAY. Why can't I fit into them already??

I think all this internal whining really has to do with the fact that I'm going home to visit family on Friday for the weekend for the first time since Christmas. Even though I weighed MORE at Christmas time, I didn't weigh my mostest until a few months after Christmas, and then had my surgery a few months after that. So, I've gained and lost a chunk of weight, but to them I'll still be big, massively, overweight Jem (that's NOT what they'll say, I promise..my family are all gems (pun intended!) and will be super cheerleadery about the whole thing even if they secretly wonder how long it will take me to stop being so absurdly massive, which THEY don't. I swear!). My BF was telling me today that she is So Impressed With My Quick Weightloss and I am Crazy For Thinking That Over Fifty Pounds Is Not A Lot, but my BF has, on the OUTSIDE, 50 pounds to lose--and that's if she wants to go from post-college-married-for-a-bit-let-yourself-go-chubby-yet-still-cute-and -can-do-strenous-exercise-like-kayaking-with-teenagers-at-the-drop-of-a-hat to omg-are-you-anorexic-you-are-skinnier-than-a-supermodel! So losing 50+ pounds to her is like the whole kit and kaboodle. To me, it's less than 1/3 of the way there (really close to 1/3, but still less!).

Also, for some reason, I can't wrap my head around getting healthier and weighing less until I hit those sizes that I've never been for more than a minute and a half. I remember going from girls directly to size 9 in middle school, and rapid fire working my way into the "junior plus" section of fashion bug by 10th grade. I've been a size 24 OR LARGER since I was 16. So, when I start fitting into 1X or size 18 clothes, I'll know this is for real. The 2X and size 20-22's will be nice, but that is WW weight loss--40 pounds that'll probably come back on if I just give it a little bit.

I guess what I am trying to say is that I am neurotic too. And I'll keep being that way until I've lost another 50 or more pounds. So, even if my scale did weight in halfs or tenths of a pound, it probably wouldn't help, because then I'd be whining about being UP a tenth a pound from yesterday or only losing four tenths from the day before. Well, I would! Happy Wednesday, everyone!